What to Do When You Realize You’ve Made a Mistake

For many of us, finding out that we were wrong can feel like a threat to our self-identity. When that happens, we’re likely to act out in ways that undermine us even more, such as arguing, blaming others, withdrawing, or digging in our heels. So, before you’re viewed as wrong and arrogant, aloof, or unaccountable, you need to get ahead of the situation. You’ll want to talk with whomever you may have impacted with your decision, including your boss, your team, colleagues, direct reports, etc. Take responsibility. Say, “I was wrong.” Don’t say “mistakes were made” or “it didn’t turn out the way I had anticipated” or any other version that deflects or minimizes your personal contribution. Offer a brief explanation, but don’t make excuses. Acknowledge that your error had a negative impact on others, and be willing to really listen, without defensiveness, to others’ recounting of that impact. Do not interrupt. Apologize. Tell others what you’re doing right now to remedy the mistake, and distinguish between the parts that can be fixed, and those that can’t. Include what you are doing to address the substantive impact (money, time, processes, etc.) and well as the relational impact (feelings, reputation, trust, etc.). Be open to feedback and over-communicate your plans. Then tell those impacted by your error what you’ve learned about yourself, and what you’re going to do differently in the future.