One of my clients, Ben, a research and development director at a pharmaceutical company, arrived at our coaching session feeling distraught. “A situation happened at work today that I can’t get out of my head,” he said. It turned out that Ben had spent hours preparing for an all-hands meeting with colleagues across the globe. He reviewed the agenda, drafted his talking points, and logged on to the conference software ready to contribute.
Stop Being So Hard on Yourself
Your inner critic is a terrible motivator.
May 31, 2021
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Summary.
Being hard on yourself is not only ineffective, but it is also a hard pattern to break. How can you take a more balanced, emotionally equanimous approach to your performance? To start, create psychological distance from self-criticism by personifying it. Then, consider your performance on aggregate versus zeroing in on a singular negative event. It helps to keep an eye on the bigger picture. Next, try to consider what could go right in equal measure with what could go wrong. Then, try to time-box your negative feelings: set a timer and allow yourself to fully experience and process your emotions during that period. And finally, expand your definition of success by broadening your scope of what qualifies as a “win.”