In Brief
The Problem
Building workplace relationships across racial boundaries can be difficult. Being one’s true self, disclosing elements of one’s personal life, and forming social connections are easier within one’s own group than they are across a demographic boundary. But employees who hesitate to open up are less likely to build the deeper relationships that lead both to success and to more happiness at work.
The Solution
Organizations that recognize this challenge can take specific steps to make it easier. Creating structure in social events (such as icebreaker games) may reduce the anxiety associated with free-form small talk. Leaders can model a learning mindset, whereby differences between people create an opportunity to hear something new. And mentorship can be especially helpful to minorities, who may feel marginalized within the organization.
When Marcus (not his real name) joined a leading international bank right out of college, he believed that success would come from delivering solid numbers. “Secure the highest returns, bring in the most clients, keep your head down, and get the work done,” he says, recalling his strategy. For years Marcus did just that, receiving awards for his exemplary work on complex deals. But despite earning the best performance ratings in his group, he kept getting passed over for promotion. One day he worked up the nerve to ask his boss why. “You are really good at your job, but the problem is that the partners feel they don’t really know you,” his manager told him. Marcus acknowledged the criticism. “I was afraid to open up,” he says. So he worked to overcome that fear. He began seeking out lunches and other social opportunities with partners and finding common areas of interest, such as children, college sports, fantasy sports, and new restaurants. He began talking more openly about his life outside the office—a key to building relationships. “Once I did that, things started to turn around,” he says. Today Marcus is a managing partner.
