13 Ways We Justify, Rationalize, or Ignore Negative Feedback

Most of us dislike negative feedback so much that we’ve even changed the name — it’s not negative, it’s constructive. But it’s an irreplaceably valuable gift. We need to know when we are doing things that don’t land the way we planned. When our impact veers from our intention. And the best — often times the only — way to discover that gap is through feedback. That said, chances are you fight against it. If you ever notice yourself saying, or thinking, “Yes, that’s true, but it’s not my fault” or “Yes, that’s true, but it’s a good thing,” it’s a clear sign that your ego is getting in the way of an important learning. Instead of minimizing the feedback, thank the person instead with this simple, reliable, default response: “I really appreciate you taking the time and the effort to tell me. Thank you.” When you stop defending against the feedback externally, you actually stop defending against it internally too.